


Samuel Hayden presents his shitty cybercar fueled by hell energy

by BeanBeanBeany



Category: Doom (Video Games)
Genre: One-Shot, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-22
Updated: 2020-04-22
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:00:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23524222
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BeanBeanBeany/pseuds/BeanBeanBeany
Summary: The UAC presentation of the new HELLMOBILE goes horribly wrong. A short dumb one-shot made to get it out of my system and as a sort of send off to my previous doom fics.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 33





	Samuel Hayden presents his shitty cybercar fueled by hell energy

A huge crowd had gathered in front of an extremely snazzy stage. The UAC had a new product to unveil and had set up this extremely expensive presentation. The lights dimmed and a huge spotlight focused and followed a man in a lab coat making his appearance.

  
  
“Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to this historic presentation! I'm Greg Hudson!" Greg greeted, speaking into a microphone “As you all know, the UAC has advanced into countless fields over the decades. Weaponry, Argent and advanced artificial intelligence to name a few! And we're happy to announce we're taking a historic step into yet another: Automobiles!”

  
  
The wall behind Greg slid open, revealing an incredibly square car on top of a spinning podium.

  
  
“Meet the ALL NEW Uac Hellmobile! A team of engineers worked countless hours to bring you this revolutionary automobile that can effortlessly tackle urban roads AND the roughest terrain you can throw at it! But, that's only the tip of the iceberg!” Hudson continued, “The UAC Hellmobile is powered and reinforced by the strength of Argent Energy. Putting its energy consumption far below contemporary vehicles!”

  
  
The audience, mostly made up of UAC employees, began to clap as soon as a teleprompter on top of the stage prompted them to.

  
  
“Thank you! Thank you!” Hudson responded as the crowd's applause began to die down.

  
  
“And now! Here to help present the UAC HellMobile, is UAC CEO: Samuel Hayden!”

  
  
The crowd was once again prompted to start applauding as a tall and imposing robot man walked out from back stage and waved at the crowd, almost basically snatching the microphone from Hudson as soon as he was close enough to do so.

  
  
“As CEO, I have great pride for those at the UAC who have innovated in the field of automobiles as they have done before in countless other fields. I'm confident that the UAC HELL MOBILE will change how we think of transport for the better.”

  
  
Samuel paced back and forth slowly across the stage “And thanks to the tireless work of the UAC, Not only will the Hellmobile be able to go off-road with ease... it will also be able to go through dimensions”

  
  
The huge monitor at the back of the stage sprung to life, displaying a video in which a young, suited man climbed into the hell mobile and drove the car through a portal. Eventually taking him to hell itself.

  
  
“The Hellmobile, from UAC” A robotic voice calmly said “Take yourself to new horizons”

  
  
The video ended and the crowd broke out into ear-shattering applause, only stopping as the hellmobile began to flash an orange tint. Much to the confusion of everyone present.

  
  
“Hudson...tell me why the car is flashing orange.”

  
  
As Hudson looked out into the crowd, shock washed over his face.

  
  
“Oh...oh god sir! It-it's him!!”

  
  
Samuel turned and deeply sighed as he saw the Slayer rampaging the crowd, eventually climbing up onto the stage.

  
  
“Well...you escaped from hell quicker then I projected...but...”

  
  
Samuel gestured towards the car and Slayer and resumed his speech

  
  
“A “friend” of the UAC is proud to present a demonstration. I believe this will prove the power of the Hellmobile.”

  
  
With no hesitation, the Slayer approached the car and thrust his fist into one of the car's windows. The sound of the glass breaking echoed throughout the stage as the Slayer stood still for what felt like minutes, eventually the Slayer pulled his fist back out and made his exit to backstage.

  
  
“And there it is” Hayden gloated “The almighty Slayer could only destroy a single window. I believe this proves the strength of our produc-”

  
  
Before Hayden could finish, the car fell apart almost like it was made out of cardboard.

  
  
“God fucking damn it...” Hayden deeply sighed “FINE, Shows over! You all work here anyway! Get back to work!”

  
  
With those words, the curtains in front of the stage closed. Some say the Hellmobile is still laying in pieces on the stage to this day.


End file.
